Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Knit On

"Knit on, with confidence and hope, through all crises". - Elizabeth Zimmermann

The only problem is, I don't. It is nearly a year since my husband lost his job and our lives changed forever. We lost our home. We were literally one step away from living in our car. Wondering where our next meal was going to come from. I questioned why I was even alive. Life was, well...unraveling.

And I didn't knit. I was surrounded by tons of yarn from years of stash building. I have everything from Red Heart Acrylic to beautiful Koigu and Cherry Tree Hill. I have all the needles, measure tapes, markers, and all the other knitting necessities I built up over the years. And I couldn't pick up my needles. And every time I tried, all I'd do was think about how I couldn't afford more yarn for this project or that project. And wondering why the hell I spent so much money on yarn in the first place when now I didn't have enough to eat. It was such a conflict.

I started dabbling back into knitting as my husband finally found a job last April. After a very long winter. And I noticed I had lots of yarn. For lots of projects I kept meaning to do.

Now my husband has a nice job. We have insurance again. We have food in the cupboard. I have a nice job that is only a few hours a week. I had a job where I worked many more hours a week, but I was away from my kids too much, and they were becoming terrible brats. We don't have as much money as we once did. We don't own a house anymore. Our cars are not great, and it's a struggle to keep them running.

But we have each other.
And a roof over our heads--a NICE roof. With a big fort for the kids.
We have plenty of food in the cupboard.
We have warm, dry clothes that fit.
I have 3 healthy, beautiful, smart children and a husband who loves me for some reason.
I don't have a lot of friends, but I have one very dear one who is far away but close in my heart and saw me through the bad and the good.

And I have lots of yarn.

It's Thanksgiving next month, and as down as I've been about life, I woke up this morning being thankful for what I have. I am a "glass half empty" person if there ever was one. I always will be. But even I can see that life goes on and sometimes it isn't so bad.

And hey, the $250 blind we got for $10 over 4 years ago for the living room window in our house (and that didn't fit that window) fits perfectly in our bedroom.
And I fit into my old jeans for the first time since I had my youngest daughter, who just turned 2.

My wish for you is may you always have money in your pocket for just one more skein, and if you don't may you have enough yarn to see you through! :)